Seeking Refuge Away From Social Media

A dialogue, just one, trying to imagine a productive pathway forward and together.

A very good and kind and brilliant friend posted:

As I  mentioned in my previous email, I am forwarding an email from the Greater Good Science Center at Berkeley. I was struck by this section: 

"What has distressed us is not which party won. Rather it is the message of hate, violence, and divisiveness that propelled its candidate to victory.  

It is not the GGSC's role to endorse a particular political party or platform. The GGSC stands for the values of kindness, compassion, humility, and empathy--values that transcend any single candidate."

The question for me is how it is possible to stand up for values like kindness and oppose values like hate and not take sides with regard to particular candidates or political parties, when one candidate runs a campaign explicitly rooted in hate and when the effect of this campaign is to unleash overt expressions hate. Another challenging aspect is that people who are overtly racist deny that they are racist. 

I have tried to do as you suggest and reach across the aisle and I have been bitterly disappointed in the fruit of that activity.  At some point, I sense that there are truly irreconcilable differences and that it is difficult to move past the zero sum game.  Of course I remain willing to work towards solutions, but there is a basic ignorance that seems impenetrable. Anyway, thanks for listening and thanks for creating a space yesterday for people to be heard. 

My Response:

Important questions. Questions I ask myself daily. I have no answers. These four ideas might help close the gap. 

(1) Trump supporters are diverse, so breaking them out into segments allows us to recognize that a portion are downright dangerous and not going to change their minds. Other portions range from those who have been duped (not by Trump as much as by decades of far right propaganda that Trump exploited) and others who are fed up with the promises we make and fail to deliver on, the weakness of the HRC candidacy, and the enormously negative impact of declining US hegemony on their lives. This allows me to see some as fellow citizens and potential allies. 

(2) Our role as the losing side is less to persuade the winners and more to listen and learn from the winners what it is that animates them so we can find a way to be a loyal opposition, rather than simple-minded and lazy obstructionists. 

(3) Learning and re-thinking takes time and connection with people and experiences unlike us.

(4) Just like when a sports team is 'amazing on paper,' but they still need to play the game, and doing that often surprised us... in this case, the winning team is a 'complete loser on paper,' but still must play the game, and a lot can (and will) happen that we do not expect.

This may not help. Might even be counterproductive or just plain naive. But this is where my heart is today. Bill